How to Be Happy Alone and 19 Reasons Why Relationships Are Overrated comes with days of research towards an individual happiness. What’s the old double standard? A single 45-year-old-man is a bachelor and happily single. But a woman of the same age is just a crazy cat lady who couldn’t get a man. Right? Wrong. It’s very possible to learn how to be happy alone and enjoy it – you honestly don’t need to be in a relationship to be considered a whole person!
It’s sad that our society puts so much pressure on us to be in a relationship or even married.
And let’s face it – even men get judged if they are single for too long. People may think he is gay, or some other reason. So it’s hard for singles out there sometimes. Basically, it’s nobody else’s business, yet people like to poke their noses in.
But fear not. If you want to know how to be happy alone, there are plenty of reasons to enjoy being single!
Why being single is actually good for you
Many people confuse being alone with loneliness. There is a distinct difference. You can be alone and be perfectly content and happy. It doesn’t mean you’re going to feel lonely or upset at having to spend time in just your own company. There’s no need to feel that way.
Being alone allows you to cultivate the most important relationship in your life – the one with yourself.
Spending time alone helps you to find out what you like in life, what you will accept and what you won’t. It also teaches you that being alone is a calming and grounding experience.
All too often we rush around trying to please other people, but learning how to be happy alone will give you a very important experience in life. It will teach you that you’re just as important as everyone else.
So, while it’s great to be in a relationship, for sure, it’s just as enriching to be single.
Far too many people are scared of being single. And instead of trying to create their own happiness, they pursue a hypothetical partner in the hope of giving “meaning” to their life. What if the partner is a shitty one? What if getting into a relationship actually makes your life so much worse? After all, a relationship with a bad partner is much, much worse than even being lonely and alone!
When you’re in a relationship with yourself, you can do whatever you want and you don’t have to consult with anyone else first. No snoring, no tantrums, no arguments. It’s actually some kind of relaxed bliss!
[Read: The benefits of being single]
20 things to focus on when learning how to be happy alone
If you’re single, you should stop sucking your thumb in the corner and feeling sorry for yourself. Embrace being single!
It’s really fun, and once you know how to be happy alone, you’ll wonder why you ever wanted a relationship to begin with. Here are some tips and really cool things to know when learning how to be happy alone.
1. You can be selfish
It’s not cool for people to be selfish in the grand scheme of things. In fact, parents try to socialize kids out of being selfish. But what we mean here is that you can do whatever you want whenever you want!
You can do whatever you please, and so go ahead and be self-indulgent sometimes. You’re not hurting anyone else by doing this, so what’s the harm? [Read: Why staying single after a breakup can be the best thing for you]
2. You get to make all your financial decisions
Feel like buying a new car just because you’re sick of the one you have? Go for it! You’re single! You don’t have anyone to answer to. You have no one saying, “What? We can’t afford that!” If you want it, buy it. How cool is that?
Of course, that doesn’t mean if you’re in a relationship you don’t have control of your own money. For sure, you do. But, if you’re in a serious relationship, the likelihood of sharing finances is higher. It’s also just good manners to talk to your partner before splurging the cash on something large. When you’re single, no issue – just do it!
3. You don’t have anyone that gets mad at you
Let’s face it – most relationships include conflict. And pretty much no one likes conflict. So when you’re single, you don’t have a significant other to start any fights.
You can live in peace and not have the constant stress of bickering with your partner. Don’t underestimate the stress and upheaval a major fight with a partner can cause, so when you’re single, you don’t have to think about any of that.
You can simply sit and listen to your friends moaning about their partners and their struggles instead! [Read: How to deal with arguments in a relationship]
3. You don’t have to check in with anyone about your whereabouts
Working late? No problem. Want to go to happy hour after work? Bottoms up! You don’t have to call anyone to ask “permission” or even to check in and let them know where you are and that you are safe. You can go anywhere, so embrace it!
Also, you never know who you might meet on one of your outings. You could meet a brand new squad, or an amazing person you want to spend time with.
5. You can be spontaneous
When you’re part of a couple, you have to sync your schedules. And because of that, you can’t decide to take a spontaneous road trip or a vacation whenever you want. But if you’re single, you can. In fact, you can do anything at a moment’s notice if you want to.
Of course, that doesn’t mean you should feel under pressure to go about doing spontaneous things all the time – you should only do it if you feel like it, but the point is that you can!
6. You can feel sorry for people who don’t have these advantages
Even though it seems like most people want to be in a relationship, let’s face it, many people are secretly envious of single people *for all the reasons mentioned in this feature*.
So instead of feeling sorry for yourself because you’re single, feel sorry for people who have a ball-and-chain they’re tied down to. In all honesty, being in a relationship is a lot like hard work much of the time. [Read: A confession – I really, really want to be single again]
7. You can learn about yourself
When you are coupled up, you don’t have a lot of time to explore yourself. You are so busy doing things with them that you don’t have time to discover who you are and what you like.
So, if you want to know how to be happy alone, remember this huge benefit. You could find a new career route or something you’re really passionate about. The opportunities are literally endless.
8. You can make new friends
Many people who are in a relationship don’t get out much. If they do, it’s with each other. So how can you possibly meet new people if you are always hanging out with your significant other? Exactly.
Being single gives you time to go find cool new friends. Let’s be honest, you can never have enough friends and while quality should always trump quality, the point is you get to go out and find new besties. [Read: 11 things about being single that people fear the most]
9. You can reconnect with old friends
Not only do you not have time to make new friends when you’re romantically committed, but it’s also likely that you’ve ignored some of the friends you already have. Not that you don’t talk to them, but just not as often.
So, pick up that phone and make some arrangements to hang out with your old friends. Then, if you do find yourself coupled up in the future, make a pact with yourself to always keep time to one side to stay connected.
10. You can decorate your house however you want
Have you always wanted a pink bedroom with flowers everywhere? Or you’ve always wanted white walls with not a thing on them? Great! Do whatever you want. Why? Because you can.
No more cringing when your partner wants to do something hideous to the place where you live. You can personalize your space however you like and you don’t have to explain yourself to anyone. [Read: 8 productive ways to learn to love the single life]
11. You can enjoy traveling alone
Okay, some people don’t like to travel alone. But if you do, then this is another perk! Maybe you’re an extrovert who loves meeting new people. Go on a cruise, take a singles’ trip, or just go wherever you want.https://bfbb182f65705931b6a3b55111122821.safeframe.googlesyndication.com/safeframe/1-0-38/html/container.html
Again, no need to compromise. Solo travel is such an enjoyable and enriching thing to do. Once you’ve tried it, you’ll be addicted, for sure. Seeing the world with no one to answer to is a wonderful feeling and you don’t have to traipse around a boring museum that your partner wants to see, just because you know you need to compromise! [Read: The biggest myths of traveling alone – My own personal experiences]
12. You don’t get annoyed
We’ve all been there. Even though most relationships start out blissfully, eventually, we find our partner annoying in some ways. And the worse the relationship gets, the more we notice how annoying they are.
But guess what? You don’t need to put up with anyone else anymore. Yay! [Read: Am I falling out of love or am I just in a rut in life]
13. You can work on your career aspirations
Another thing to remember about learning how to be happy alone is that you can focus on your career. If you’re a workaholic, then be a workaholic.
No one is waiting for you to come home to eat dinner with them. Climb that corporate ladder. Or, if you want to explore new career options and start all over again, you have the time and focus to do that. The sky is the limit for you! [Read: 15 things to do when you feel like you’ll be single forever]
14. You can be unrealistic
Have you always wanted to start a restaurant? Backpack through Europe and find odd places to work? A significant other would likely talk you out of that because they would think it’s unrealistic.
But if you are the only one to answer to, then, by all means, be unrealistic if you want. Sometimes the most ‘out there’ plans turn out to be totally life-changing in the best possible way.
15. You can flirt up a storm and nobody gets jealous
If you go to a party or out to a bar with your friends, you can be a social butterfly and flirt with everyone you meet without a jealous lover giving you the evil eye across the room.
Flirting is great for your self-esteem, and now you can do it whenever you want.
16. You’ll become more self-reliant
This may not sound like a tip for learning how to be happy alone, but bear with us. Whether you have to learn to fix something around your house or sew on a button, it’s great to learn to do something by yourself.
That way, you don’t have to depend on other people if you don’t want to. The confidence you’ll gain from every challenge you face will change your life for the better.
17. You can avoid a bad relationship
There is nothing worse than being in a bad relationship. Well, sure, we guess there is. But you know what we mean.
You don’t have to be constantly stressed out and negative if you’re single. Because if you’re single, that means you’re not in a bad relationship. Right?
18. You don’t feel guilty about anything
All of the things we’ve mentioned above… buying a new car, staying at work late, taking a spontaneous trip… they all come guilt-free. No one will make you feel guilty but yourself – but we don’t suggest you do that.
It’s a free feeling that means you’re able to go out and create the life you want.
19. You get the bed all to yourself
While some people love to snuggle with someone as they sleep, if you’re not one of them, then you get to hog the bed. Rejoice in all the space you have!
There is no one snoring loudly, or moving around and constantly waking you up. You’ll sleep like a teenager with no care in the world! [Read: 10 Struggles Only Single Moms Understand]
20. You can help break society’s stereotypes
The stereotype of a single person isn’t always a good one. But go ahead and show the world that you know how to be happy alone. Not only do you know how, you absolutely love it!
Eventually, people will stop judging singles and just mind their own business. After all, there’s nothing abnormal or strange about being single, it’s the most natural thing in the world.
If you want to know how to be happy alone, these tips will help you. So, are you ready to embrace being single? Go for it! You’ll learn to love it.