How to Be a High Value Woman and Stop Settling for Less

How to Be a High Value Woman and Stop Settling for Less

Feeling like a high value woman who deserves to be cherished and completely beloved is not so easy to create! Especially if men have disappointed you and even broken your heart. It is not easy at any time or for any woman. Even celebrities confess that they are insecure. Accessing self-confidence is a challenging process for all of us. It certainly was a struggle–a major knock-down-drag-out struggle–for me. But, as I struggled, I learned one simple, incredibly powerful secret to creating the confident ‘me’ who is a high-value woman and the love-filled life I wanted to live.

How I Learned to Become a High Value Woman

I learned how to harness the natural growth pattern of life to help me shine. And that is the secret I want to share with you in this blog. It will boost you up beyond your wildest dreams. This secret certainly has worked big-time for me! I am sitting here, more in love with my hubby Sam than I’ve ever been. Here in my dream condo on the 14th floor, with floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the azure waters of the ocean. I’ve been blessed to be on my personal mission to bring love to you! I never ever would have dreamed that I would be able to have the high-value self-worth to create the life I am living, given my background as an unwanted nobody’s girl. When I was born my father didn’t even want to come to the hospital to see me. You get the picture!

But I was able to create a new identity for myself that took me from unwanted and devalued to feeling like a high-value woman. This secret made it so–and rapidly. As you learn about my core secret, you will understand the process that will make your high-value positive self-affirmations pop and manifest.

Self-Confidence & the High Value Woman

Let’s look carefully at the goal– being, owning and acting as a high-value woman who has real-life, irresistible self-confidence. Yes, yes, yes!  It is a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.  This is the kind of self-confidence that makes you attractive, magnetic, charismatic, the kind of confidence where you can be truly real and authentic, make silly mistakes and elegantly recover your poise, live out your quirks and eccentricities and know that they make you adorable, fun, funny, loving, and lovable. The ‘it’ factor that draws guys to you. Think such self-confidence is impossible for you? Well I want you to hear me right now: I’ve seen that kind of sparkling self-appreciation emerge over and over in our clients’ lives, no matter what they have been through!

The Challenges of Becoming a High Value Woman

I’ve seen that magic of becoming a high-value woman unfold in many students and clients. Among those that felt old and over the hill because they were in their 40s, 50s, or 60s. Also, in women who are 50 pounds overweight and feeling that weight in more ways than one. I’ve seen that transformation in women who have been cheated on, who feel rejected, crushed, abandoned and humiliated.  unempowered and believing that they may never be chosen because of their issues and baggage. They believe they have to settle or grasp at whatever crumbs they can get because this is the best they can do. Until they practice the powerful process you’re about to learn.

How a High Value Woman is Created

Now, let’s look at the three powerful practices that create the experience of being a high-value woman. At its core, self-confidence is an experience, a sense of self-assurance based on a set of affirming beliefs about yourself. In fact, these beliefs are grounded in appreciation of your own personality, beauty (everyone has beautiful aspects!), spirit, sensuality, humor, brains, and unique attractiveness. So know you have it, my love! Just take my word for it! You have it going on! Because each person does in their own unique way!

High Value Woman: Practice 1

Let’s get started on your journey to living your life full out as a high value woman. The first step is to find your own unique expression of confidence—one that tickles you, that you find intriguing, or flat out would simply love to have. You start by deliberately making positive statements about yourself in your mind and aloud that are inspiring and nourishing. And you truly allow yourself to play with the process. To be bold and grand, even if you are not feeling it!

Using affirming beliefs leads to positive self-talk, which is very powerful. Participants in one study who said self-affirmations before a new social encounter reduced their thoughts about being rejected, compared with another group that focused on the event and worried about who would be there.
Just pretend for a moment you can choose who/how you want to be regardless of any challenging reality or heartbreak you may be facing right now. Go ahead, play full-out, be creative and push the envelope.

High Value Woman: Practice 2

First, jot down ideas about how a high-value woman feels. Then, get the engine going until you feel freer and freer to write down whatever comes to mind. If a statement feels scary, that is good—you are pushing the edges of your growth. If it feels great to think of a particular affirmation, then it is right on target. Putting your attention on a positive belief about yourself is one of the most powerful creative forces at our disposal. For example, practice some of these affirmations:

Begin with “I am“:

Lovable and appealing.
Fun, funny and irresistible.
A beautifully unique child of God.
Sparkling and radiantly alive.
Delightful and adorable.
Radiate and attract love.
Charismatic and magnetic.
Charming and captivating.
Engaging and enchanting.
Lovely and fascinating in a way that is easy and effortless.
Entirely deserving of miraculous, surprising, lasting love.

When you make self-affirmations, you build on positive experiences from the past, and, more importantly, you are programming for new fulfillment of being a high-value woman in the future. Global or glowing affirmations about yourself don’t necessarily work in the time frame you would like—usually they take longer. But they do work. Make no mistake about it. The more attention you put on the loving self-declaration, the more quickly it will manifest. But you have to put your attention on it like you would on a mantra—lightly and without attaching to the affirmation too tightly. I call this Mantra Affirmation Activation.

High Value Woman: Practice 3

The general rule of Mantra Affirmation Activation is, when doubts or other negatives arise, treat them as if you were sitting in meditation: observe them without judgment. Notice and acknowledge your self-doubts and do not fight them. The more you acknowledge the doubts without struggle, the more quickly they will go away. then, always return to your high-value woman affirmation, like you would go back to a mantra after a distracting series of thoughts. In this way you will be flowing with the natural zig-zag pattern of growth.

So for example, if your affirmation is “I am a darling funny, cherished, high-value woman” and you immediately think, “Ha! I am a fat pig!” accept that pushback comment. And repeat the affirmation to yourself– “I am a darling funny, cherished, high-value woman”. In fact, gently go back to the affirmation, no matter what negative comments you get from the peanut gallery of your critical mind! Just go back to the affirmation! And the affirmation will win! You will experience being a high-value woman and get the great love you deserve! You go girl!


Written by Johnnywriter

Johnnywriter (a.k.a Johnny Speaks Relationships) the Founder and co-editor of Hisparadise. Relationship counselor and Life coach. His priority is helping people realize their self worth and have a happy relationship. Johnnywriter has covered topics related to depression, anxiety, stress, relationships and difficult family circumstances. With an understanding that there is never too much information and helpful research about relationship problems in all of its forms, He continues to look for new and creative ways to both start discussions & engage with others about these important topics.


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It’s a common experience: You meet someone new, and things are going great — but after a short time, you’re left wondering what went wrong. If you find yourself longing for more time with someone who has lost interest, you are not alone. Terms like “ghosting” and “benching” have been coined to explain this experience. The list below provides reasons why people suddenly lose interest and suggestions to prevent it from happening again. 1. Low confidence — One of the most common reasons why people lose interest is because the person they’re dating lacks confidence. Confidence counts for a lot. Consider a person — and we all know at least one — who is physically unattractive, yet has many dating options. The reason they do so well is that people are drawn to their confidence. Insecurities may not be obvious right from the start, which is why two people could go out a few times before one person has a change of heart. What can you do about it? Boost your confidence! High self-esteem results from being comfortable in your own skin and excelling in valued domains. Ask yourself, what parts of your life do you want to improve upon? If you feel insecure about your body, prioritize getting in shape. If you are insecure about your job, enroll in courses that will get you to your desired profession. Even working towards those goals will boost your esteem. Keep in mind, there may be some things you cannot change. In that case, tackle what’s malleable and accept the things that are not under your control. 2. Caring too much — Some people are desperately seeking a relationship. They are unhappy on their own and long for someone to spend their life with. Dating partners quickly pick up on — and are turned off by — this quality. Well-rounded individuals, by contrast, are comfortable on their own; they don’t need a partner to feel whole. What can you do about it? If you find yourself in this situation, come to terms with the idea of remaining single for the rest of your life. Once you feel comfortable with this notion, you are ready for a healthy partnership. It could be difficult, at first, to accept this possibility, but it will force you to reflect on who you want to become as an individual. Then, when the time is right, that special person will come into your life and add to who you are, not serve to complete you. 3. Bad timing — If none of the above applies to you, then perhaps the partner lost interest because the timing wasn’t right. We have no way of knowing all that is going on in someone’s life — may be the person is already in a relationship, maybe they are still getting over someone, the list goes on and on. The phrase “It’s not me, it’s you” applies here. You have high confidence, are perfectly happy on your own, and available for that person to enter your life, but if they aren’t in the same place, none of that will matter. What can you do about it? Be okay with the unexplainable. You can’t understand everything; some things in life are a mystery. Have faith that if the relationship is meant to be, it will work out when the timing is right for both people. In the meantime, get busy doing things for yourself, like eating right, exercising, spending time with family and friends, and being open to receiving all the positive experiences life has in store for you. 4. Too much too soon — Sometimes both people are in a good place, ready to start a relationship, but after a hot and heavy start, the spark fizzles out. What went wrong? This can happen when a relationship accelerates too fast and has nowhere to go but down. The physical attraction that draws two people together is often so intense that the partners want to spend all their time together, and when they’re apart, they’re texting constantly and obsessively thinking about each other. Although this can be fun and exciting, the risk is that the relationship doesn’t last. What can you do about it? Be deliberate about a relationship’s progression. Even when you’re starting a new relationship, and things are going great, balance is important. Don’t neglect important people or aspects of your life when you get into a new partnership. Also, work on building the friendship within your new relationship. The most satisfying, long-lasting partnerships have a balance of passion and companionship. You want to ensure that you and your partner have things in common, beyond the physical chemistry. If you follow everything on this list and still find yourself being benched or ghosted, don’t fret. As stated above, people have things going on that you will never understand. A person who doesn’t prioritize you isn’t worth your time and effort, so don’t get stuck on them. Keep an open mind, work on yourself, and have faith that you are right where you need to be. Book appointment with John

4 Reasons Why your Partner is losing Interest in you. (what you can do about it before its too late).

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