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Love and Relationships

5 Reasons Why Leaving A Relationship Is Harder Than Falling In Love

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5 Reasons Why Leaving A Relationship Is Harder Than Falling In Love according to Anita Elohor, An Author at Hisparadise

Most of my clients keep asking why leaving a relationship is harder than falling in love, and i believe most of us have been in a relationship that we have found so difficult to walk out from and we have also been in love, so i decided to write an article about this based on life experience.

First of all I would be deliberating on the reasons why we fall in love and why we fall out of love before going further to seeing why leaving a relationship is harder than falling in love. (13 Proven Ways To Move On From Your Ex)

REASONS WHY WE FALL IN LOVE

Love makes the world go round, but why exactly do we fall in love?

From my life experience I got to discover that we individuals fall in love for three basic reasons which are; intimacy, passion, and commitment.

  • INTIMACY

 Most people fall in love based on intimacy, falling in love for intimate reasons can be describe as having a basic friendship, besides developing a close connection with someone, a lot of people seek intimacy for self-enhancement, it doesn’t necessarily have to be sex, sometimes it’s a self-serving. Everyone likes to feel cared for and loved. Women want to feel their “femininity”, and men want to feel their “masculinity”. (5 Things to Know If You are Going Through a Painful Breakup)

  • PASSION

People also fall in love because of desire or strong feelings for a person. Passionate love is developed as a result of feeling that leads to sexual attraction, physical interest and romance, when you see someone you like, you are captivated by something that draws you to the person.

  • COMMITMENT

Commitment is complete love, people who seek commitment wants stability and a healthy relationship, when we see how an individual is commitment to you in one way or the other we tend to start loving such a person which is a natural thing. (7 Ways to Create Emotional Safety in Your Relationship)

REASONS WHY WE FALL OUT OF LOVE

Love requires the presence of trust and respect. Falling in love is easy. The difficulty is remaining in love and committing to your partner forever.

Here are some reasons people fall out of love

  • LACK OF COMMUNICATION

When you start a new relationship there is abundance of sharing, but i got to discover that as time goes on the communication withers, based on the comfort knowing each other there is the discomfort of not wanting to ask again or say same thing again and for this fact communication is being shut down.

  • FEELING INVISIBLE

Some partners tend to take each other for granted after some period of time and based on this fact there is a feeling of merely existing in the relationship. Making love becomes the thing of the past. You stop touching and complimenting each other. You begin to act like roommates rather than lovers and then love grows cold.

  • ATTRACTION IS GONE

What kills attraction? The inability to have fun. You stop going out, stop going on night dates or doing specials things that keeps the relationship going. Most times it has nothing   to do with physical appearance but the things that go unsaid or undone. You fell in love with that person for many reasons and when those reasons are no longer there you tend to fall out of love. I would encourage you to read this if you are a woman(10 Biggest Mistakes Most Women Make In Relationship) and you can download our free eBook on attraction

  • DISHONESTY

Cheating and other secrets destroys relationship, and it’s not just infidelity that destroys trust, it could be that your partner is doing drugs or has lost his/her job. Not sharing is the same as lying. It diminishes all credibility in a relationship.

REASONS WHY LEAVING A RELATIONSHIP IS HARD

Based on research and life experience we have found out that going into a relationship it’s easy but leaving its quiet difficult even when we realize its an abusive one we tend to find it really difficult in letting it go based on the following reasons.

  • WASTED TIME, RESOURCES & INVESTMENT

This is one major reason why leaving a relationship is hard because we always consider the fact that we have wasted a lot of time, resources and investment so we rather prefer to stay in an abusive relationship. (How to Get Out of an Abusive Relationship)

Some months back i came across a young lady who has been in an abusive relationship for seven(7) years but found it so difficult in letting go based on the fact that she has wasted seven(7) good years of her life, she had invested a lot into the relationship, she had turned down so many suitors just to be with him so it was really difficult for her walking away, so she preferred being in that relationship rather than moving on, so I had to encourage her not to see life from that perspective but rather walk out from an abusive relationship no matter how long it has been or how much she has investment.

  • FEAR OF STARTING AFRESH

We all as human always get scared of starting life afresh especially when it comes to relationship, we always have that fear inside of us, just like the scenario I gave about the young that has been in an abusive relationship for seven(7) years and it wasn’t just working but she was so scared of walking out of it, even though she was seeing the red light that it wasn’t going to work she kept on hanging in because of the fear of starting afresh, going into a relationship again, where would she possibly start from after years of getting used to a particular person, so sometimes fear of starting of afresh makes still hang in. (6 ways to Let Go of Someone Who Treats You Badly)

  • FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN  

This is also another reason we individuals find it hard to leave a relationship, because we sometimes put so many things in consideration, like;

  • What if i meet someone worst than him/her?
  • How do I start building up a relationship again?
  • Can I ever love someone else again?
  • Would I recover from this heartbreak?

And by the times these questions start arising we tend to get scared of walking out of that relationship

  • THE FEAR OF BEING ALONE

In my professional experience as a writer, as well as my own experience, I have found out that no one wants to be alone, no one wants to walk out of a relationship without having someone else, so with this, we humans tend not to walk out from a relationship based on the fear of loneliness so they rather being with who they with rather than being alone. (Why staying single after a breakup can be the best thing for you)

In conclusion falling in love is easy to do, rather than leaving a relationship, you can easily get attracted to someone because of a little kindness or there about, but you can’t just wake up to leave a relationship without putting a lot into consideration. I hope you find this article interesting thanks.

Author

Am Efetobore Anita Elohor, a relationship blogger I write articles on relationships, giving relevant advice on how to have a great relationship, we also offer online counseling for young adults having issues with relationships. I hope you find my articles enticing

2 Comments

  1. Victoria Er Reply

    This is a great piece, I see myself in this situation more often

  2. Abasi Nyong Reply

    When u said People also fall in love because of desire or strong feelings for a person. Passionate love is developed as a result of feeling that leads to sexual attraction, physical interest and romance, when you see someone you like, you are captivated by something that draws you to the person. you are indirectly talking to me

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