It’s truly important you know what you want in a relationship. Please make sure he knows this early on.

If you are looking to find a man you are going to spend the rest of your life with but you’re dating a slider, you’re going to be the one getting hurt.

Ask yourself if the man you are with is just into the dating scene and moving from woman to woman or whether he’s looking for the girl he doesn’t want to be without.

You’ve got to ask yourself the tough questions and face the music if you are going to figure out whether he is marriage potential.

Sure, it might sting reading this article, but the sooner you figure out where you stand, the better for YOU!

Here are a few rock-solid signs he doesn’t want to marry you.

SIGNS HE DOESN’T WANT TO MARRY YOU

SIGN ONE: THE CRAZY EXES!

If a guy has been seasoned with a few serious past relationships, that’s a good thing. It means he isn’t afraid to commit to one woman for a decent amount of time. That’s definitely a good thing.

However, if he tells you that all of his exes are off the deep end, you need to consider this a warning that he might never want to marry you.

Perhaps his ex-girlfriends really were nuts, but more likely than not, they wanted something a little more serious, so he panicked and ran for the door.

You might believe you are different than all the other women he’s dated, but you aren’t.

SIGN TWO: HINT OVERLOAD

Most men aren’t dumb, and they understand when you drop hints about wanting to get married. The point here is you shouldn’t have to keep dropping hints.

If he wants to marry you, he will ask you. Pushing him to do it is never the right thing to do, because if you do get married, it might come back and bite you in the tush.

It’s better to be so amazing that he can’t stand the thought of you being with another man, so he gets down on his knee and pops the question. This is something you don’t control. He has to make the decision and he’s gotta want to marry you.

SIGN THREE: DISTANT WEDDING DATE

Maybe you convinced him to ask you to be his wife. That’s a great start, but if he keeps pushing the wedding date way off into the future, that’s a ginormous sign he really doesn’t want to have your hand in marriage.

Some men feel pressured and only ask a girl to get married so she stops bugging the crap out of him. Along the same lines, sometimes it’s the friends and family who do the pushing.

Keep your eyes wide open for this one.

SIGN FOUR: WAITING FOR THE PERFECT TIME

If your man is always making excuses as to why he hasn’t asked you to get hitched, you’ve got to consider the fact he’s not going to marry you.

Excuses get you nowhere fast, and if he’s always too stressed from work or he keeps getting into fights with his family, there’s a good chance it’s not going to happen.

If a guy really wants you, he’s not going to let any obstacle get in his way. In fact, he’s going to do everything in his power to make it the right time to marry you.

SIGN FIVE: NO FAMILY TIME

This is a very bad sign. If your boyfriend has family and you haven’t met them yet, there’s a real good chance you never will. When a guy loves a girl, he wants to show her off, and this includes to his family and friends.

There’s no doubt, if he’s planning on spending the rest of his life with you, he’s going to show you off like he would a gold medal.

On the flip side, there is the slight chance you haven’t met his family because of geographical reasons or because they are incredibly dysfunctional. However, if that’s the case, he should have already discussed this with you.

SIGN SIX: HE SEEMS TO BE SOMEWHERE ELSE

If your man has been acting distant, like he’s going to break it off, it may be a clear signal he really does want to break up. When a guy doesn’t have the confidence or balls to talk about his true feelings with the woman he supposedly loves, he’s definitely not marriage material.

SIGN SEVEN: HE CHILLS YOUR CONNECTION IN PUBLIC

If he only sometimes holds your hand in public and introduces you to people with just your first name, this is a sad sign he isn’t confident in your relationship. When a man is planning on marrying a girl, he wants to make sure everyone knows you are both off the market.

This wishy-washy stuff doesn’t make sense when you are looking to get married. He must feel proud you two are a couple.

If he doesn’t seem proud, take this as a big hint he doesn’t want to be with you forever.

SIGN EIGHT: YOU AREN’T IN HIS FUTURE

You have no summer holidays planned together or plans to move in together, and he doesn’t ever plan anything in advance with you. This means you are not in his future plans. Perhaps you are just the girl of the moment, as much as that might sting.

If he truly loved you, he would be setting up and including you in his plans for the future. When that isn’t the case, you are best to end it and move on before you get hurt even more.

SIGN NINE: HE’S NOT INTERESTED IN MEETING YOUR LOVED ONES

When a man doesn’t want to or isn’t interested in meeting and getting to know your family, he doesn’t want you long-term. Think about it for a minute. Wouldn’t you want to meet the family of the person you want to marry?

That’s a no-brainer.

This is where you need to draw the line. If he doesn’t take the initiative to show you or tell you he wants to meet your family, then you know he doesn’t want to marry you.

SIGN TEN: DISINTEREST IN YOUR PLEASURE

This is another in-your-face sign that he doesn’t want you in his life like you want him. When a man just wants his needs taken care of in bed and he isn’t interested in making sure you orgasm too, that shows you he isn’t the guy you deserve.

If you are just a tool to pleasure him in bed, you need to drop him and move on. When a man really loves a woman, he wants to make sure he’s pleasuring her in bed beyond her wildest imagination.

SIGN ELEVEN: VOIDED SOCIAL MEDIA

If you are never mentioned in his social media posts, Facebook and Instagram, that’s a surefire way to tell you he is never going to marry you. What he is saying to the world is that you aren’t important to him and he is flying solo.

Worse yet, if he hasn’t changed his relationship status to mention you, he’s gotta be kicked to the curb pronto.

That’s not what you deserve, so if this is the case, you’ve got a decision to make.

If he cared about you, he would be flaunting you to everyone possible.

SIGN TWELVE: “I LOVE YOU” FLOWS FREQUENTLY

Some men jump the gun and very early on in the relationship, and they will tell a girl they love her—almost as if it has no meaning. Anyone can say those three words. What’s tougher is saying them and meaning it.

If he is telling you how much he loves you after the first date, you better not take it to mean anything. It takes time for love to develop and grow, and that means he’s a fake if he’s not giving it time.

Sure, you might be flattered at first, but the feeling will wear off and you will be left with wasted time. Don’t let that happen.

SIGN THIRTEEN: HE’S A SWEATBOX

Some men are naturally nervous, and that’s okay. But if your guy starts sweating up a storm and can’t find his words when you bring up the topic of marriage, he’s just never going to ask for your hand in marriage.

Truth be told, he doesn’t even want to think about the possibility of marrying you. If you really want to get married and he shows you he can’t even think about it, then you need to end it and move on.

SIGN FOURTEEN: HE CAN’T MAKE A DECISION…PERIOD

When a guy can’t even decide what pants to wear, what makes you think he’s going to be able to make the ultimate decision to marry you?

Indecisiveness is a super strong indicator that he’s never going to muster up the courage to ask you to marry him even if he wants to.

That’s very sad and very true.

SIGN FIFTEEN: WISHY-WASHY MAYBE MAN

If you bring up the topic of marriage and he replies with a grey “maybe,” it’s just not going to happen. Particularly if someone else asks him about it and he doesn’t give a definitive answer.

The man you deserve to be with should want to scoop you up and shout, “This girl is mine!”

SIGN SIXTEEN: HE’S AN EXCUSE BOY

If he’s always making excuses when you start talking about marriage, he’s not going to ever ask you to walk down the aisle with him. Perhaps he wants to get a better job first or wait till after his cousin gets married next year.

It doesn’t really matter because if he is just a bag of excuses, you need to take this as a hint he will never follow through.

You deserve to be with that special man who treats you like gold, the man who wants to marry you, the guy you can’t picture your life without.

If he doesn’t want to marry you, then you need to consider the fact he might not be the boyfriend you thought he was.

WARNING FLAGS YOU’VE GOT A BAD BOYFRIEND

WARNING FLAG #1: HE’S A TOTAL LIAR

If you have a boyfriend you always seem to catch lying, that’s a sign he’s a crappy boyfriend. When he’s never honest about his life at all, it’s time you stop taking it and tell him it’s over.

That’s just the right thing to do for you.

WARNING FLAG #2: HE HAS A LEASH ON YOU

When you’re with a guy who is controlling and doesn’t want you to do anything without being under his watchful eye, it’s likely he can’t trust himself. This shows he’s insecure and doesn’t like you hanging out with your friends.

This points to the cold hard fact he’s crappy for you.

WARNING FLAG #3: ILLOGICAL EXPECTATIONS

When you are with a guy who insists you are loving, attentive and sweet to him and he doesn’t return the favor, he’s a creep.

WARNING FLAG #4: CAN’T TELL YOU HE LOVES YOU

“I love you” is something your boyfriend should be telling you if you’ve been together for any length of time. Keep in mind he shouldn’t be saying this to you after date number two. If he is, that’s an issue.

But if you’ve been together for a few months and he still hasn’t told you he loves you, give your head a shake because he’s a bad boyfriend.

WARNING FLAG #5: NO BALLS

If your boyfriend doesn’t have the balls to stand up for you when someone else disrespects you, then he’s not the man you deserve. Even if it’s one of his friends who says something inappropriate, he should have the decency to put him in his place.

That’s just the right thing to do.

WARNING FLAG #6: UNBALANCED TREATMENT

You’ve got a bad apple when he always treats you like he doesn’t need you, but you need him. This is another example of total disrespect, and you should never stand for it. Healthy relationships are all about balance and loving respect.

WARNING FLAG #7: JEALOUSY OVERRIDE

When your boyfriend has extreme jealousy over you, he is showing you he can’t trust you. Yes, a small amount of jealousy is healthy, but when you cross that line, it can be downright dangerous.

If he continuously accuses you of cheating with any man you go near, that’s a solid indicator you don’t need that jerk. You deserve to be trusted.

WARNING FLAG #8: NOT TOP PRIORITY

In a true loving relationship, he should treat you as his top priority. You shouldn’t feel like an option at all. This means he needs to first consider your wants, needs and desires and to do his best to fulfill them. Thinking about you should be a 24/7 thing for him.

WARNING FLAG #9: LOVE ME, LOVE ME NOT

You’ve got a crappy boyfriend if he’s all lovey-dovey when you are alone behind closed doors but acts uncaring when he’s with his family or friends.

Chances are he’s buttering you up for one purpose only, and that’s to get you into the sack for some fun. Yes, sex is important in a healthy relationship, but it’s not everything. You deserve to have a guy who always shows you he loves and cares about you, regardless of the setting.

WARNING FLAG #10: NO QUALITY TIME TOGETHER

When your man seems to never be able to make any quality time for you, that’s a strong indicator he’s a jerk. If he’s full of excuses all the time and can’t figure out a way to find some time to spend with you, then you need to say bye and move on.

WARNING FLAG #11: CAN’T SAY SORRY

This is the worst! If your man can’t ever tell you he’s sorry, and if he never accepts responsibility for his life screw-ups, he’s not good boyfriend material.

Worse yet, if he always points the finger and puts the blame on everyone else but himself, then he’s definitely not the man you should want to be with on any level.

WARNING FLAG #12: NEVER THERE FOR YOU

I had a boyfriend like this. I made an effort to make sure I was always there when he needed me, but when it came to my needs, he just didn’t bother.

That’s the definition of a crappy selfish man. I remember getting ready to head off to university and needed help packing the truck up and unloading it. He stayed over and slept in while I loaded the truck, took it to school and unloaded it. The jerk came up later in MY new sports car, conveniently just after I was done. Worse yet, I let him get away with it!

Don’t make the same mistake I did. Kick him out of your life now!

WARNING FLAG #13: IT’S HIS WAY OR THE HIGHWAY

If you are with a man who always has to have it his way, never letting you get what you want, he’s a crappy boyfriend. A solid relationship is all about working together to make certain decisions together. It’s gotta be a mutual thing you work at together.

Don’t let him get away with it.

WARNING FLAG #14: HE’S ABUSIVE

There is no excuse for hitting a woman. If your man has threatened you or hit you when he was mad, you need to end it right now.

If he’s hit you once, he’s going to do it again, no matter how much he apologizes afterwards. This is a dangerous situation you need to get yourself out of before it escalates into something worse.

WARNING FLAG #15: NO HAND HOLDING IN PUBLIC

A couple should want to claim their turf in public and show affection. Holding hands is one of the sweetest ways to connect and let the people around you know you are together. If you have a boyfriend who doesn’t want to have any physical contact with you in public, you need to take this as a sign he’s a crappy boyfriend.

He should want to hold your hand and let the world know he cherishes you.

WARNING FLAG #16: SHUTS YOU UP

You have a terrible boyfriend if he won’t let you talk to him about something he did that hurt you. If he shuts you up when you want to talk about how you are feeling, he’s not the guy for you.

WARNING FLAG #17: FLIRTING WITH OTHER WOMEN

This one is just plain disrespectful. If your man isn’t afraid to flirt with other girls in front of you and message them back and forth on his phone, you need to take the signal and split. This is likely just the tip of the iceberg.

You deserve respect, and he isn’t giving you any.

WARNING FLAG #18: TIP-TOP SECRET

If your boyfriend is very secretive and you know very little about him because of this, that’s not a good sign. Chances are he hiding something from you because he knows if you knew, it just wouldn’t fly.

Get out of this fast before you are in too deep.

WARNING FLAG #19: PICKS YOUR FRIENDS

If your partner is so controlling that he tries to pick who your friends are, you need to accept the fact you are dating a creep. Nobody has the right to choose who you hang out with, especially a shitty boyfriend.

WARNING FLAGS #20: CONTROLS YOU – FREEDOM FOR HIM

You have a jerk for a boyfriend if he does whatever the bleep he wants but won’t let you do anything without him or at least without his approval. That’s a dangerous man that you need out of your life.

FINAL WORDS

Relationships aren’t easy. It’s important you keep an openminded perspective when it comes to figuring out whether your boyfriend is the right guy for you. There’s no use staying in a relationship that’s unhealthy or dangerous. So, paying attention to the warning signs of a crappy boyfriend is key to your happiness, saving you further heartache.

When you are looking for that man you want to marry, make sure you consider each of these signals separately that he isn’t ready to tie the knot. Love is blind and sometimes it’s better to call it quits instead of settling and knowing you are never going to get what you want, which is that happily ever after.

Think with your head and not just with your heart.

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A counselor, Life coach and a friend who's ready to listen and provide answers to your questions. His priority is helping people realize their self worth and be strong emotionally. As an editor, contributor, and writer for over 100 online publications Johnnywriter has covered topics related to depression, anxiety, stress, grief, various phobias, relationships and difficult family circumstances. With an understanding that there is never too much information and helpful research about relationship problems in all of its forms, He continues to look for new and creative ways to both start discussions & engage with others about these important topics.

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